When Hercules stood at the base of Mt. Vesuvius about to do battle with the “Sons of the Earth” bandits (a.k.a. the guys that look like that giant from the Green Giant commercials, except not green) he must have looked across the fire-circled hand of the gods that reached to the sky and wondered if he had indeed stepped into the final circle of Hades itself.

He also must have marveled at the beauty of the flames spitting high into the sky and the smoke and ash that came slowly down like purple rain (Prince-style).

(Nobody knows that for sure because the guy writing his story was boring and it was about 8,000 years before the D-40 so one has to wonder what the Mountain Workshops could have done with an actual mountain of fire to cover.)

Hercules also must have wished that Ryan Craig could have been there to write about his adventures instead of that punk-ass “historian” Diodorus Siculus who actually invented the term windoufuss baggonous — otherwise known today as “wind bag.”

Ryan Craig would have done old Hercules and his adventures proud, but instead he is trapped in this mortal realm as a rural journalist who has been twice voted the “most interesting man” in the 42220 zip code.

Craig, an accomplished journalist who once had his sanity, bought the Todd County Standard newspaper in Elkton, Ky., in 2006 and has not known a peaceful night’s sleep since. Still, all the hard work and eating disorder have paid off and Craig’s Standard has been named the best small weekly newspaper in Kentucky for the past five years.

Craig’s hobbies include but are not limited to muskrat chasing, dry mud diving, miniature Coca-Cola Christmas Village collecting, being the president of the Boutros Boutros-Ghali Fan Club, starting fights between Star Wars and Star Trek fans, crying when ever Billy Joel is on the radio, pimping my Ford Taurus and crocheting (with razor blades).

Craig lives in Elkton with his wife, Jenni (this is not a joke) Craig, his 11-month-old daughter Summer and his sons Owen, 7, and John, 4, and he couldn’t be happier.

So as we sojourn through this week it is Ryan’s hope that he can crush your writing soul and build you back up to be able to not only tell a story through your lens, but through your words as well.